Monthly Archives: September 2017

No free rides or happy landings in the Presidential inner circle.

Tom Price In Free Fall.

So another good Trump man has gone,
Tom Price has been dismissed by Don,
No public servant has blown so much on luxury flight,
Arduous journeys magically became transports of delight.

Since Don asked Tom where the funds came from
There will be no more high flying for poor Tom,
From being on board Air Force One with the President
He’s flown from favour faster than a Muslim immigrant.

So Toms going back to the bad old days,
Of long queues and longer delays,
Tom had no answer, the Don has spoken;
Much longer and his record would be broken.

Since Don has thrown him out on his tight ass
Its a seat in cheap ‘n’ nasty Economy Class,
Tom’s paying the price, he’s now flying right, not wrong,
Even smiling at that spoiled brat that screams all flight long.

Lest people think a ‘fair and balanced’ view is not part of this blog I offer a Weiner story. Dirty, disreputable, dodgy and a Democrat. Sleaze, stupidity and sexting, all in one oh so simple package.

Junk Mail.

Before the good Judge stands ex-Congressman Anthony Weiner,
Wearing a Valentino suit, Berluti shoes and a sorry demeanour,
After flicking through his cell phone pics she had never seen a
Clearer need for slapping on an extra year, and hand cleaner.

What a fine upstanding and changed man Tony appears,
But knowing he will be going away for nigh on two years
After hearing his plea for clemency has fallen on deaf ears
He fears he may soon be shedding more than crocodile tears.

He looks to his Defence team who look sad and defensive,
Its no easy brief representing one who you find reprehensive,
Yet should he appeal, their work will be full and comprehensive;
Oh joy, he’s going to appeal and it should prove hopeless AND expensive.

As incarceration approaches and his appeal on a slippery slope
His loyal lawyers come up with some advice to help him cope;
‘If all else fails , pray to a higher power, and never lose hope,
And if in the shower, whatever you do, don’t drop the soap.’

The President takes a knee, where it matters, right in the Tweet spot.

Patriot Games.

Those who take the field, then kneel
Upset the mighty Chief a great deal.

It’s disrespectful to the ol’ red white and blue,
Some colours matter in his jaundiced view.

Those who don’t stand tall and proud-
Don glares incandescently at that crowd.

Watch how those baby blues of his smolder,
Seeing ’em, arms locked, shoulder to shoulder.

Don believes a servant/master relationship is required,
Kneel and stand every chance of the boss saying ‘you’re fired.’

Their lack of traditional respect is his darkest fear;
He gathers about him allies, friends, near and dear…

As Foxes fair and balanced report is repeatedly viewed
He feels some protesters have an uppit- negative attitude.

His flag not being revered is a sight Don really regrets,
A view shared by a veritable slew of his confederates.

Election time in New Zealand- neither Labour and National can govern without the help of the third minor party, New Zealand First, of which Winston Peters has loooooong held court. Now red and blue have to appease and appeal to Winston.

Rooting Around At Animal Farm.

Jacinda’s labouring to muster a grin
After a rough election night,
But if you think Bill’s celebrating with Win
You’d only be half right.

She seems sad today but she’s still young and green;
Tomorrow she won’t look as glum,
For three years hence she should be queen;
Then the princesses time will come.

In winning Bill still looks like a beaten dog
While Winston smirks like the Cheshire cat,
If the cost of victory means kissing the frog
Jacinda is grateful to Bill for sparing her that.

Another police shooting. And so another inquiry has begun. And the silence is already deafening.

The Same Old All Too Familiar Refrain.

Those served to protect us have done it again,
Another poor innocent schmuck has been slain,
He had hold of a metal bar, the cops saw it plain,
He treated their orders to halt with quiet disdain.

Those served to protect us have done it again.

The weapon in his hand he foolishly chose to retain;
Now came the moment of truth for which cops train,
One discharged his Taser, for there’s laws to maintain,
One discharged his gun, yet neither engaged their brain.

Those served to protect us have done it again.

Who is guilty, who is innocent, the Police will ascertain!
Luckily Sanchez’ loss of hearing might well prove their gain,
In life Sanchez had been silent, dead, silent he will long remain;
Its two fine officers word against his, and he sure can’t complain.

Those served to protect us have done it again.

Spoiler alert not needed! I have a soft spot for old horror movies, but sometimes they do drag on. So, a few six word plot summaries.

Alien.
Kissy face huggers become bloodthirsty buggers.

Aliens.
Heroine arrives, burns aliens hives. Survives.

The Fly.
Taut time travel tale. Time flies?

Psycho.
Norman loves being a mummys boy.

Frankenstein.
Doctor at dead end. Shock horror!

There’s light on the horizon for Korea, Don just said so. Unfortunately that light might –

Don And The Art Of Diplomatic Dialogue.

Don stalked up and talked down to the United Nations,
It sounded less a calming talk than a call to action stations,
Looking aghast as the pearls of wisdom fell from his mouth
Delegates weighed up the odds of both Koreas going South.

Members of every race, creed and religion rolled their eyes
As their prayers and entreaties to ANY Divine intervention dies,
Those hopes for North and South to peaceably co-exist one fine day?
Well, Rocketman’s response to Dons bombast blows that theory away.

Crystal Palace, yet another seamless managerial transition.

A Kick In The Nether Regions.

A parlous place to be is Crystal Palace’s bosses seat,
Frank’s just found out- four weeks in, and it’s job complete,
But frankly if your team loses the first four, AND can’t score
You know Steve Parish will show you Palaces revolving door.

Steve thought he’d struck a bargain in hiring a Dutch treat,
But Franks tenure was brutally short, Steve acted tout suite,
Long suffering patience is not something Parish has time for;
Ask last years Manager, or any of the many who went before.

The President looks into the eye of the storm, and what does he see?

Hitting Home Where It Hurts.

Don watched unhappily as Irma ripped through the Caribbean,
It was enough to whiten the face of the most bronzed Floridian,
In Maryland, monitoring Fox’s monitors his eyes grew ever bigger;
Camp David’s quite close enough to the action for this leading figure.

Donald certainly didn’t mind Cuba taking a hit,
Commies getting blasted worry him not one whit,
But when he sees the Land of the Free is in Irma’s path
Far too much prime Florida Real Estate is in line for a bath.

Now the size of the approaching apocalypse is finally grasped
He kneels, and together two tiny trembling hands are clasped,
A thought for the poor, the homeless, all those lost and scared,
And he prays, like a man possessed… that Mar-a-Lago be spared.

Suffer the little illegal children?

Getting A Hand Up- Palm First.

To those DACA children who Donald loves so dear;
He has news for you, news you won’t wish to hear,
Yes, yes, he loves you but his actions make it clear
He’d love you twice as much were you not here.

All those barriers your parents crossed,
Their permits and passports unembossed,
Now Don has costed what his wall will cost
His words of guidance to stray kids is- get lost.

It’s not right to say Don simply does not care,
But DACA kids are brown, and to Don that’s not fair,
Americans deserve to dream, so you get the nightmare;
Don fervently hopes you’ll ALL make fine citizens- over there.