I can but feel for your poor statesman Barnaby Joyce,
Being called a Fair Dinkum Kiwi leaves him fairly f… annoyed,
But PLEASE, give your ex second-in-command a second chance?
Him washing up on our fair shores doesn’t exactly leave US overjoyed.
President Trump is feeling embattled
So Don does what he does when rattled,
Out comes the finger, to his phone its pointed
And out flies a tweet, fevered and disjointed.
Give the President a phone
But pray for a Presidential tone.
He says other Presidents didn’t make the tough call
For those who served the cause but took the fall;
He sees a noble sacrifice, she sees her man in a body bag,
Cold comfort when gazing at a coffin shrouded in a flag.
Can someone please take his phone away?
Understanding and empathy ain’t his forte.
Surely Don must know that in honoring the departed
By his own admission his words must sound half-hearted,
Didn’t his reaction to the Charlottesville ‘situation’ provide
A precedent for sending some sympathy to the other side?
There he stands, mirror held in trembling hand,
‘NOW who’s the First and fairest in MMP New Zealand?’
The mirror reflected back on one more mottled than tanned,
A countenance carrying, let’s face it, a myriad of lines in the sand.
His preen- preparations had taken much longer than planned-
But didn’t that dapper dude look grand when he took the stand?
Thursdays deadline lies in the past for our handsome man in command,
He’ll hold on till next week, then he’ll hold out ANOTHER ransom demand.
You won’t hear Don publicly shouting he’s a genius;
That he only quietly and privately admits,
Him not believing he’s stup…endous is plainly disingenuous,
So Rex is bound to be the loser in this battle of wits.
…So now we know, once and for all;
In defeat, set back on his seat a sullen Don sits
Adjusting his dunces cap to Extra Small,
But let’s credit Don for knowing that when the cap fits…
‘My NRA comrades-in-arms, times are fraught,
Rally to this call to alms, hand us your support,
A certain someone’s turned to Vegas as a last resort
And left us with the repercussions and a nasty report.
So, with wounds still raw and feelings overwrought
Now it’s time to practice what our forefathers taught,
To cherish old traditions for which they slaved and fought,
NOW is not the time to talk Control, perish (ahem) the thought.
Now you take your time to reflect, maintain silence and comport-
As the painful headlines fade, the peoples memory grows short;
Then we’ll be spendin’ time at Congress and the Supreme Court,
Every gun totin’ donation helps prove justice can be bought.’
The House always wins, that’s what they say,
Yet you’re free to drink, whiling your money away,
But this sombre October morn may mark the destitution
Of the tucked away-in-a-quiet corner Mandalay Bay;
Surely too many have lost today?
So it’s in God we trust, and pray
We can live with the price we must pay
For retaining an old hide-bound cast-iron Constitution,
And a President who aims to make a Great USA,
But doesn’t care or dare to take on the NRA.