The cheap-skate landlord’s dilemma; They get the key, you get the deposit. No backsies!

Flight Risk.

I see the ranks of homing pigeons swoop and soar,
There’s gotta be a flocking thousand of ’em or more,
They wheel o’erhead, hovering high above the low rise I let,
Leasing the ‘penthouse’ out too cheap is one deep abiding regret.

I was glad to sign the lease for that seedy top floor-
A two-year ironclad deal is what a landlord prays for,
But concern is building due to his installing a pigeon coop aloft,
It’s not the constant cooing from on high, more the elevated waft.

The whirring of the wings above is impossible to ignore,
The sourness of signing off on a bad deal sticks in my craw,
As birds keep landing on my landing my dim view’s growing dark,
It’s not all their swooping but their pooping that’s leaving its mark.

 

Prompted by Chelsea Ann Owens Weekly Hilarity Contest.

©Obbverse

7 thoughts on “The cheap-skate landlord’s dilemma; They get the key, you get the deposit. No backsies!

  1. mistermuse

    Are there no nuisance laws in your city?
    If not, all I can say is, “More’s the pity.”
    So let’s get down to the nitty-gritty —
    Just screen off the landing from the pigeon shitty.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  2. obbverse Post author

    Thanks again for the kind reply in kind! My mind harks back to a song by The Trashmen, ‘Surfin’ Bird’ Timeless lyrics like ‘everybody knows the bird is the merde,’ or something similar.
    Ain’t no shutter, aint no screen, aint no mesh
    Can keep my landing smelling forest fresh.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Pingback: WINNER of the Weekly Hilarity Contest 5/8/2020 | Chelsea Ann Owens

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