Top Gun. 'Mericans sure do love their guns, They're hellbent on law and order, They think we're the crazy ones, Completely armless, North of the border. But most of us simply can't understand Why they don't practice gun control? You can have a hot gun in your hand Even if you're a crazy lyin' criminal asshole. Concerned about your stint in clink? Worried about your upcoming arrest? Thank God only the upstanding NRA think There's no need for your character test. A .50 caliber has always appealed? Go out and and pick one up today! You needn't keep your Colt concealed, Just whip it out and blaze away. But outside 'Merica the Great Them Rights leave everyone else aghast, 'Merica's Number One, in every dang State- Yep, in firearm deaths, World unsurpassed. 'Guns are part of our way of life' Say the NRA, not in ironical jest, 'From the days when crime was rife, From Tea Party through Wild Wild West.' 'Because it's our Right,' bray the NRA, 'To amass us a private arsenal,' Just imaginin' being back in the day Of the rootin' shootin' OK Corral. 400 million guns, the NRA say, all legally sold, According to the lists they lovingly compiled, It's peace of mind, to have and to hold- One apiece for every man, woman and child. Does the NRA truly think the entire Nation Need to bear their own personal Kalashnikov? Why bother US with futile peaceable negotiation? Most members are rarin' for a Mexican stand-off. Still the NRA say 'more guns the merrier,' Its twisted logic, bound only to confound, To me more guns sounds progressively scarier, But to the NRA 'Zero Control' holds Holy Ground. But surely no sane person would let fly When everyone's armed to the teeth? Only the crackpot NRA can live with that lie; Its stone cold comfort to those laid beneath. In the NRA's strange Land of the Free They'll snuff out any gun control Bill, Sovereign citizens, too short-sighted to see Their sacred Rights lead to gross overkill.