Category Archives: humor

Donald on the down-low; Stormy Daniels getting the cash, McCabe getting the push. Who says Don is a petty President?

Lies In The Eyes Of The Beholder.

Donald was all for political leaks
In the elections frantic final weeks,
Then a whistle-blower was a patriot,
Now Donald is President, they’re not.

Since Donald’s butt is in the hot seat
All he does is bleat and Tweet,
Now Donald’s no whistle-blowers friend,
Demanding all this disloyalty must end.

Andy McCabe spoke out of turn
And is the latest one to learn
That Donald brooks no dissension
If you want to collect your pension.

Yes, it’s best for you to stay mute
About Donald and some massively cute
Woman he came accross on the golf course;
Don doesn’t want to cough up for a divorce.

No, best to keep that story hushed,
Don might emerge red and flushed,
When it comes to a marital moral lapse
Don is keen to keep it all under wraps.

Dons lawyer has done his expensive best
For Stormy to keep it close to her expansive chest;
Could Melania believe its all a storm in a double DD cup?
Don should’ve busted the bank to stop this going ti-… belly up.



Rex Tillerson and Donald Trump, a parting of the ways. Who’d have thunk it?

Such Sweet Sorrow.

It’s goodbye to Rex, ex Secretary of State,
The latest to find Don’s America ain’t so great,
He suspected Mueller, not he, would be going next,
But the Great Man fired him, and predictably, by text.

Could that be a tic twitching on his cheek?
From a weary eye do we see a teardrop leak?
How bravely Rex strains to remain comported
But his mask of a face seems strangely contorted.

Does old Rex look sad and forlorn?
Perhaps it’s my eyes, but I could’ve sworn
That only yesterday Rex looked much older,
A man bent of back and stooped of shoulder.

We haven’t seen this face of Rex for a while,
That glum morose face enlightened by a smile,
He used to always flash that slick oily smile once:
Where’s it been hiding for the last fourteen months?

David Warner, cricket maestro, mouths off. Dave takes offence to someone verbally maligning his wife on the field. This is known as ‘sledging’ and Davids team are the masters. Oh, and David does lead from the front.

A Sympathetic Ear.

Oh, Davy Warner, you poor delicate innocent little flower,
Has the onfield jolly jokey blokey jousting begun to sour?
Did De Kocks disagreeable dialogue offend the ear, so tender
Of crickets deep-dredging low down sledging main offender?

It’s understandable for Davy to blow his fuse
When his wonderous team occasionly gracelessly lose,
But even when the bas Baggy Greens win
He can’t help putting his too little sense in.

So what has brought about whining Warnies petulant pout?
He can’t take the fact someone else is dishing it out;
So does he keep his counsel, as a good vice-captain ought?
Crikey, not on your ever-loving effing blinding life, sport.

Communicating with the President is a tough call for Hope Hicks.

Out Of The House.

In her dealings with the everyday madness at Dons funny farm
Ms Hicks has dealt with the in-patients with patience and calm,
She has dealt with infantile rants and rages with some aplomb,
Quietly remaining a trusted rock in the Trumpian maelstrom.

But after an enlightening little nine-hour talk
Hope seems happily resigned to take a walk,
She told them she’d told a few little white lies,
What they told her widened those innocent eyes.

She follows in the footsteps of many who’ve gone before,
Dubke, Spicer, Scaramucci, now Hicks and how many more?
Donald sits in the middle of another great big steaming mess;
Who dares hope to control his eruptions knowing he’s Hope less?

Donald and the NRA’s Mr LaPierre see there’s a problem with school shootings. They looked at it, and, boy, have they got the problem cracked!

Principles Of School.

The Prez ponders on the question of the latest school shooting,
The NRA have found an answer that they’re keen on contributing,
The first priority for a teacher is to be a passable problem solver,
The second, say the NRA, is to aim to be be first class with a revolver.

Don and the firearms manufacturers think its a policy worth backing,
Although pupils may well be petrified knowing Sir or Ma’am is packing:
Those still attending Stoneman Douglas must feel a touch of concern-
Just how many bloody lessons does it take for one’s learned peers to learn?

Donald listens quietly, and gives an answer that wildly misses the question. Well, he did give the appearance of listening.

Donny Goes To School.

Donny listened to the students claim
That in school shootings guns are to blame,
Though Dons views and theirs aren’t quite the same
Donald does agree these shootings are a crying shame.

Don does think arming teachers will change the game,
Oddly, and crazy as it sounds, the NRA endorses his aim.

Barnaby Joyce, Aussie Deputy PM and National Party leader resigns amid sexual conduct revelations. A man of high moral standards falls on his sword, sort of.

Bye Bye Barnaby.

Barnaby Joyce’s behaviour has been foul,
Impregnating his ex-press secretary Nikk.

Now the National leader’s tossed in the towel,
Those stains- on his character!- are gonna stick.

Some consider him to be a pain in the lower bowel
But he’s proved he’s just a prize prick.