Category Archives: Politics

Don rallies support at Mississippi for Brett Kavanaugh, and attacks the lack of total recall of a woman assaulted years ago by him, allegedly. When it comes to justice, luckily we can rely on Don to judge. Don really hopes there won’t be many more taxing times like these.

Being Seen To Be Done.

At the rally Donald took the sword
To the testimony of Ms Blasey Ford,
How high Donald’s rhetoric soared-
From his lips the scorn petulantly poured.

See how his red-capped rabble rousers applaud
The irreverent words of the man adored,
The cheap shots and low blows Don scored-
Shouldn’t his deplorable words be deplored?

No, Don don’t believe some conniving broad-
Nor those mean #me too chicks who sew discord-
Don’s happy to let Brett take the Supreme award
And welcome another rich red-faced man aboard.

But there are some words Don’s pointedly ignored-
Loans Don got from Fred before he went to his final reward-
Up there, on high (or more likely, down with the Dark Lord,)
All FAKE NEWS, Don swears solemnly, a TOTAL fraud.

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Don goes off to the United Nations, then on to centre stage. He walks the walk. He stands up, he delivers his knock-out punch. Wow, what a champ.

Worldly Wise Guy.

Before the United Nations Donald stood,
He was gonna show ’em, gonna tell ’em good,
All his accomplishments he was proud to state-
Modestly thinking his speech was not just good, but great.

Don smiled and waited… for the thunderous applause,
His words had caused his audience considerable pause…
Back home his rallies had rednecks cheering wall to wall,
But his clap trap didn’t move this audience to respond at all.

Then came a titter, then a giggle, then laughter uncontained,
Being the funny guy is one thing Don had never entertained,
Now the Great ‘Merican Hero’s smug smile is looking grim,
Leading the free world is no joke when the laugh’s on him.

I read a passage or two the other day on how the zealots and moral guardians down here on Gods good earth can come to terms with the temptations of Trump. It seems almost all can be forgiven. Now, let us pray…

A Flipping Miracle.

Good God, I find it hard to believe those who do believe
That Donald Trump is part of Gods mysterious Master plan,
Those of blind faith who found a black president impossible to conceive
Yet can find little fault in this one, Gods Right White quite imperfect man.

Any conservative will admit he’s a philanderer,
But Sweet Jesus, Donald’s making a great nation,
And doth the Good Book not say, ‘to be human is to err?’
Let’s give Don the benefit of doubt (and a liberal translation.)

How the bloody righteous paw through chapter and verse,
Praying pardon for their (play)boys less than model behaviour,
Finding any blessed reason to praise a man Beelzebub would curse;
How Divine, stumbling on such a forgiving anti-Gay-Muslim-Refugee Saviour.

When Don read the opinion piece about his dysfunctional workplace he wanted answers, not anonymity.

There’s Where The Answer Lies.

Don heard reports his House was in a chaotic state,
News guaranteed to make him rail and fulminate,
So now Donald’s mulling over lie detector tests
To truly protect the priviliged Presidents interests.

Don wants a full and frank confession on record,
Either via the lie detector or preferably, water board,
And once he he finds out who is his anonymous source
It will all end in a tirade, tears, and then… in divorce?

A book launch for Bob Woodward, the doyen of political writers, followed by a measured critique from Don and those- still- at the White House.

Fear And Loathing In Mar-a-Lago.

It’s been two years since the rise of President Trump,
Now he’s experiencing the ol’ half-way slump,
Now the (FAKE!) polls maliciously confirm
All ain’t rosy in the White House at mid-term.

Don was handed Bob Woodwards book,
He unwrapped it with hands that shook
With an endearingly childish sense of anticipation,
He then bent forward to read Bobs dedication…

Don read the fine print with twitching lip,
Words traced by the Presidents fingertip,
Soon he realised the hurtful things Bob said-
After sounding out the words in his head.

With the maturity for which Don is known
He reached for the comfort of his flipping phone,
And after a furious CAPITALISED tweet
Found Bobs home number and pressed ‘delete.’

Upon hearing Dons cry of wounded pride
Ivanka rushed in to the Presidents side,
Jarred stood by, a look of fear in his eye
As unPresidential curses and papers flew by.

Don railed at Bobs charges, completely unfounded,
In a frenzy Donalds desk was dementedly pounded-
We could’ve all been facing an incendiary September
Had the desk top launch code been easier to remember.

With half the White House staff facing eviction
Sarah Huckabee denounces Bobs book as fiction,
While Don goes through Bobs book page by page
Balling ’em in the waste basket, incandescent with rage.

All Don humbly asks of those who ‘advise’ him
Is for ’em to subserviently agree to his every whim,
Don does not take criticism (or Fear) well, I’m afraid-
It’s been his single failing since, oh, Fifth Grade.

What? All change at the White House legal team- again? Ah well, Donald is chafing to personally fix the legal system anyway.

The Law Is An Ass.

When Dons innocent dealings caused offence,
When he’d find himself in need of legal defence,
When he found the going getting pretty sticky
He’d call Mr Fix-it Cohen, AKA Tricky Mickey.

But now Don feels incensed, full of fury and regret,
For his once trusted Cohort and Mr Mueller have met,
Mikey’s gathered up all his tapes, notes and diaries
And is helping Bob with his probing enquiries.

Now his top White House Counsel loyal Don McGahn-
Who for thirty hours of Bobs grilling defended his boss man-
Sweating through the gruelling Summer, backed against the wall-
Finds Don’s designated him to take retirement and the fall by Fall.

In solidarity Stefan Passantino, McGahns Deputy and protege
Has tendered his resignation, beginning the end of the day,
With evidence of dark White House intrigues proving so abundant
As Lawyer-in-charge of White House Ethics, obviously Stef’s redundant.
 

The President honors one of his GOP fallen friends with a little flag waving. With friends like Don who needs eulogies?

True Colours.

When a mighty ‘Merican hero has passed
The White House flag stays at half-mast,
Till the last effuse eulogy has been expressed
And the fallen warrior is laid to his final rest.

It might fly for a day, could be a week
Before he goes to ground, so to speak,
But these days our bold new President
Is showing he’s above displays of sentiment.

Now, on Dons House, it flutters only half a day,
It’s petty and petulant, but ain’t that Dons way?
A new low, but the way this President’s carrying on
A dip of flag will do when it’s time up for Don.