Category Archives: religion

Six word book summaries. I keep stumbling over these, and love the idea of them. So here’s a few, old and new, hopefully presented with a touch of humor.

Alice Through The Looking Glass.
Alice falls down, goes to Crazytown.

Moby Dick
Footloose old salt trailing whale tale.

Wuthering Heights
Cathys unhappy home, Heathcliffes moody manor.

Fifty Shades Of Grey.
Modern bodice ripper, boy maltreats girl.

Silence Of The Lambs
Hannibal tells Clarice a gristly story.

Frankenstein.
Dead End Doc, rejuvenates. Shock, Horror!

The Bible
Big Fellas BIG seller. (Popular Fiction)

The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon.
Lost girl nightmare. Tough to bear.

It’s Not About The Bike (Early Lance Armstrong ‘inspirational’ bio)
Drug pedaling Tour De France loser.

The Three Musketeers
Three musketeers, add D’Artagnan, go fourth.

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The soccer/football World Cup, England, the semi-finals, and finally, a reason to believe?

Getting The Cross In.

It was months and months of Sundays back I began to doubt
The words Father McEvedy would by rote routinely spout,
But this July St George has never seen anyone so devout,
For it feels the world is about to end
When your World Cup hopes depend
On England miraculously winning a penalty shoot-out.

So many years as a lapsed Catholic and an avowed atheist,
The cold comfort of the confessional, all too easy to resist,
Yet I’m rattling the old rosary, praying, hoping for an assist,
Perhaps He might help out Southgates squad-
Argentina don’t need a helping hand from God,
Good Lord, what better reason to prove You exist?

A Supreme Court judge resigns, allowing Don to choose his replacement and skew justice ever so slightly, conservatively speaking.

Good Old Christian Values.

It’s amazing what the Supreme Court can achieve
When the last vestige of moderation takes his leave,
Whatever dour sour pick Don picks the Court will Rightly receive
Their full complement of five God (and Don) fearing Sons of Eve.

Don’s impious Muslim  travel ban bias is easy to perceive
So it’s a particularly ‘Merican God to whom they will cleave,
But if you accept a virgin can miraculously spontaneously conceive
It does leave this peculiar Presidents pretences easier to believe.

In Ireland it looks like blasphemy is being taken off the books. That’s the latest word.

A Touch Of The Blarney.

In Ireland the Church has long held sway,
It’s been ”listen to Father’ for forever and a day,
Eternally, paternally told to watch what you say,
To blaspheme means you’ve Hell to pay.

Or at least a spell in Purgatory.

But now it’s influence is on the wane,
Soon it will not be a crime to profane,
Though many Fathers will dogmatically remain
Convinced it’s a sin to take Gods name in vain,

And to say so deserves a stint in the reformatory.

Father McEvedy kneels in despair,
He’s been praying hard to Him up There,
But his cassock and faith are getting threadbare;
Christ, what happened to the power of prayer?

Perhaps He’s deaf to old fashioned oratory?

Soon, I swear, you’ll be able to say your piece
And not be forced to confess to the priest and police,
When a quiet oath is not heard as a breach of the peace;
In Ireland, miracles and wonders will never cease.
 
If you believe the old old story.

They do lead us on, sometimes at the risk of a little profanity and blasphemy at times, these high and holy rollers.

Sky Pilot.

Jesus told Preacher Jesse Duplantis to get
A fifty-four million dollar Falcon jet,
Jesse wants it to spread Gods word
But that Falcon’s one big flipping bird.

So Jess kneels humbly down and makes his pitch plea
Prays to his poor congregation to contribute, monetarily,
Jesse will all too gladly take you- by the hand,
Even kiss your cheek should you give ten grand.

‘Twill enrich your future prospects in the eyes of the Lord,
But it is a promise, at present, all too few can afford
When Jess possessed three other jets in which to sally forth
By what God given right has he got to go buy a fourth?