Category Archives: Security

Donald and the NRA’s Mr LaPierre see there’s a problem with school shootings. They looked at it, and, boy, have they got the problem cracked!

Principles Of School.

The Prez ponders on the question of the latest school shooting,
The NRA have found an answer that they’re keen on contributing,
The first priority for a teacher is to be a passable problem solver,
The second, say the NRA, is to aim to be be first class with a revolver.

Don and the firearms manufacturers think its a policy worth backing,
Although pupils may well be petrified knowing Sir or Ma’am is packing:
Those still attending Stoneman Douglas must feel a touch of concern-
Just how many bloody lessons does it take for one’s learned peers to learn?


Aloha from beautiful Hawaii, its a quiet peaceful morning. So why would my cell be sending me a warning..?

38 Minutes Later.

‘Dear citizens of Hawaii, I’m appealing for calm,
The incoming missile alert has proved a false alarm,
There is no need to panic or evacuate the town,
We’ve downgraded from Code Red to Code Brown.’

A new year and already it’s time to give our inspirational leaders a big hand.

Big Big News.

Between Kim Jong Un and Dippy Don
You have to wonder where diplomacy ‘s gone?
Now it’s not about whose twitchy finger is on the trigger
It’s about whose dangling digit is perceived as bigger.

Boys, boys, one look in the mirror does suggest
On a little reflection, you’re little boys -at best,
So, Slim Kim and Dinky Don, is there just a minuscule chance
You two can keep your hands pocketed in your Big Boys pants?

More with a sigh rather than a scream of frustration after yet another assault on the senses.

Once More, With Feeling.

This week it’s been in a dusty little Texas town,
There half a congregation were gunned down,
Another week, another maniac with a gun,
And next week there will be another one.

Our betters wring their hands once more,
Much like last week, and the week before,
Another abomination, another crazy crime,
But DON’T mention gun control at this sad time.

Soon in Sutherland Springs they’ll bury their dead,
A stirring never-to-be-forgotten speech will be read,
But thinking a lesson’s been learned would be a mistake-
Not with Freedom and a high-powered Amendment at stake.

Our fine leader wears a face wreathed in sadness
But he shows no will or want to rein in the madness,
So, next week when some gung-ho gun nut goes insane
We’ll send our condolences and hopes and prayers- again.

Welcome To Las Vegas, where good fortune and good luck finally ran out; Thank God the NRA have an arsenal of explanations and the bucks to explain it all away.

A Word In Your Shell-like.

‘My NRA comrades-in-arms, times are fraught,
Rally to this call to alms, hand us your support,
A certain someone’s turned to Vegas as a last resort
And left us with the repercussions and a nasty report.

So, with wounds still raw and feelings overwrought
Now it’s time to practice what our forefathers taught,
To cherish old traditions for which they slaved and fought,
NOW is not the time to talk Control, perish (ahem) the thought.

Now you take your time to reflect, maintain silence and comport-
As the painful headlines fade, the peoples memory grows short;
Then we’ll be spendin’ time at Congress and the Supreme Court,
Every gun totin’ donation helps prove justice can be bought.’

Don goes South, bringing glad tidings, and a million dollar bailout. Thanks a bucketload, Sir.

Show Boat.

When Main Street looks more like a boatyard,
When canoeists row ’round inner-city boulevards,
When rain is measured not by the inch but by the yard
Will Don pour more funds into his Coast or Border Guards?

After Katrina left Bush with a failed report card
Donald diligently drops by to give Texas his regards,
That sad sodden state sure does look sorrily ill-starred,
First Harvey, then Donald- two most unwelcome blowhards.

Sometimes all that incendiary talk is more than hot air.

Teed Off On Vacation

When he was polishing his ball out on his course
Don found he had the the time to talk of applying force,
Off on vacation, still chipping away, Don began to ponder
On launching things other than balls into the wild blue yonder.

Part of Dons game is matching fire with fire
But when Kim hears Dons voice his rises higher,
To Donald it’s merely vainglorious sabre rattling,
More obnoxious oafish juvenile bully-boy prattling.

Dons crazy talk is reciprocated by Kim Jong Uns,
Anyone listening knows they’re both Loony Tunes,
And so Donalds words, so lacking in diplomatic grace,
Fulsome words full of braggadocio, blow up in his face.


Do Dons thoughts turn to Melania and Ivanka
As he self-pityingly putters around in his bunker?
Seems Kim had found Dons gentle joshing… annoying;
The anger from their fallout is more than Seoul destrying.