Category Archives: smoking

The President gets all up in arms and goes ape over vaping.

Dry Cough.

Don is going to make a stand,
Donald wants vaping banned,
Donald sees that noxious cloud
And decides ‘that can’t be allowed.’

Donald knows its deadly stuff;
It all starts with just one puff
Then kids are dying in the streets
According to Don’s concerned tweets.

How many lives will Don’s law save
From puffing away into an early grave?
See, Don canĀ do what’s good and right,
Might he yet become our shining light?

Don has proved saving lives can be done,
Now, can he handle the NRA smoking gun?
Shoot down the leading cause of accidental death?
I wouldn’t hold my breath.

Notre Dame, you’ll be the ruination of me. Consider this a rather un-PC silly and frivolous french folly.

Merde Feu.

What a damnable shame,
Seeing grand old Notre Dame
Fired up and aflame.

Due to the fire
The ol’ Dame does require
A bigger better spire.

When the roof fell
It left Gods glorious citadel
Blazing like merry Hell.

With the roofs falling
The conflagration became, frankly appalling,
For the French, galling.

Above the gathering crowd
Arose a bitter Gauloises cloud-
Smoking oughtn’t be allowed.

One man, eyes a’stinging,
Amongst klaxons blaring, bells a’ringing,
Stands hunched, hands a’wringing.

Who could sleep last night what with the excitement of Santa Claus’ impending arrival? Looking up to the sooty sky I could scarcely imagine the stress on that ol’ coot in the red suit… Anyway , something sparked the imagination.

Merrily On High.

Down the chimney Santa Claus went
But he’s a touch laden down at present,
For Santa may wish to discharge his duty
But Santa Claus is carrying too large a booty.

The dazed and confused residents below
Heard his ‘Yo ho ho’ become an ‘uh-oh.’

Santa was stuck fast ‘neath the chimney pot-
Speaking of which, pot is legal now, is it not?
They puffed and strained to smoke the stout fellow out
But a man of Santa’s weight can butt wait and mellow out.