Category Archives: tweet

Donald on the down-low; Stormy Daniels getting the cash, McCabe getting the push. Who says Don is a petty President?

Lies In The Eyes Of The Beholder.

Donald was all for political leaks
In the elections frantic final weeks,
Then a whistle-blower was a patriot,
Now Donald is President, they’re not.

Since Donald’s butt is in the hot seat
All he does is bleat and Tweet,
Now Donald’s no whistle-blowers friend,
Demanding all this disloyalty must end.

Andy McCabe spoke out of turn
And is the latest one to learn
That Donald brooks no dissension
If you want to collect your pension.

Yes, it’s best for you to stay mute
About Donald and some massively cute
Woman he came accross on the golf course;
Don doesn’t want to cough up for a divorce.

No, best to keep that story hushed,
Don might emerge red and flushed,
When it comes to a marital moral lapse
Don is keen to keep it all under wraps.

Dons lawyer has done his expensive best
For Stormy to keep it close to her expansive chest;
Could Melania believe its all a storm in a double DD cup?
Don should’ve busted the bank to stop this going ti-… belly up.

 

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A(nother) shooting at a ‘Merican school and the President knows who to blame and what to say. Also, what it pays not to say.

Default Setting.

Yet another school shooting in Florida leaves us numb,
From the President the prayers and platitudes come,
More fretting and flapping of Trumpian gums
Followed by a frenzy of twittering thumbs.

Don is rightly upset about what some crazed kid has done,
Though the conclusion he arrives at sure is a strange one,
Oh so many sorrowful words for lost daughters and sons;
And not one single syllable about the madness of guns?

The President is the grateful recipient of the kind of check he not only likes but fully endorses.

Fit As A Fiddle.

Don’s taken his Medical and he has passed
Despite his penchant for eating his food fast,
He thinks he cuts a, if not fine, an imposing figure
Which he’s assiduosly working at making even bigger.

His trusted Doctor says Don is doing GreaT,
He’s given his grateful President a clean slate,
Don fairly flew through a test specifically designed
For a President possessing his particular state of mind.

All the Doc asks is for Don to take more exercise-
Forgo his nightly regime of stretching for french fries-
Normally Don wouldn’t pay heed to a White House minion
But one thing Donald doesn’t need is a damn second opinion.

No Doctors orders for Don when he takes to his bed,
He retains his healthy appetite for ordering in instead,
There’s nothing that makes another sub-par day complete
Than a tasty treat of fried chicken, followed by a greasy tweet.

Melania Trump wants to stop bullying? Irony doesn’t even come close.

Bully For Her!

From deep down in Melania’s good heart
The feeling slowly began to stir,
In her rarefied social world bullying must play no part;
How blindingly brilliant of her?

So she took it to her darling spouse
And ran her thought past him,
Don’s demonstration of communication in his White House
Saw that bright idea dim.

Don can’t help himself when it comes to comes to commiserations, or letting us all know how much better he is at it than his predecessors.

Getting On Don’s Good Side.

President Trump is feeling embattled
So Don does what he does when rattled,
Out comes the finger, to his phone its pointed
And out flies a tweet, fevered and disjointed.

Give the President a phone
But pray for a Presidential tone.

He says other Presidents didn’t make the tough call
For those who served the cause but took the fall;
He sees a noble sacrifice, she sees her man in a body bag,
Cold comfort when gazing at a coffin shrouded in a flag.

Can someone please take his phone away?
Understanding and empathy ain’t his forte.

Surely Don must know that in honoring the departed
By his own admission his words must sound half-hearted,
Didn’t his reaction to the Charlottesville ‘situation’ provide
A precedent for sending some sympathy to the other side?

The President takes a knee, where it matters, right in the Tweet spot.

Patriot Games.

Those who take the field, then kneel
Upset the mighty Chief a great deal.

It’s disrespectful to the ol’ red white and blue,
Some colours matter in his jaundiced view.

Those who don’t stand tall and proud-
Don glares incandescently at that crowd.

Watch how those baby blues of his smolder,
Seeing ’em, arms locked, shoulder to shoulder.

Don believes a servant/master relationship is required,
Kneel and stand every chance of the boss saying ‘you’re fired.’

Their lack of traditional respect is his darkest fear;
He gathers about him allies, friends, near and dear…

As Foxes fair and balanced report is repeatedly viewed
He feels some protesters have an uppit- negative attitude.

His flag not being revered is a sight Don really regrets,
A view shared by a veritable slew of his confederates.

Guarding the Land of the Free with pride and dignity? Donald might not agree according to his latest communication, directive, early morning crotchetiness or whatever it is that enters his ‘thoughts’ in his dim early mornings.

Mutinous Looks From Th Ranks.

Out comes another early morning tweet from the Great Defender,
‘Good folk of the Services, whichever services you render,
You resignation I and my Forces request you tender-
You can’t kill for my country if you’ve changed your gender.’

Dons life-changing tweet means one important thing- Don is a trender,
Only he and Christ knows if his born-again stance fits His or his agenda,
But even the Pope’s throwing his arms Heavenwords in surrender,
So please God could you return that dumb sh- twitterer to Sender?