Tag Archives: Education

Thinking back on them good(?) ol’ school days, of pimply adolescence, tough lessons and first silly soppy juvenile teenage love.

Greasy Kids Stuff.

It was the first day of February and one thing was clear,
I was never ready to face this bright new school year,
A step up towards High school, and higher learning
Left this poor student with his poor stomach churning.

A spotty youth, a third former, the lowest of the low,
Puberty was kicking in, and it was beginning to show,
Pimples and blackheads blighted this once fresh face,
As soon as one eyesore faded, two more took its place.

I did learn three things on my first day at Hagley High,
The first was to say ‘yessir’, and never ever question why,
Second, the Headmaster held more authority than God above,
Third, I fell for a girl, with all the pure passion of puppy love.

This girl was The One, the one I worshiped from afar,
This girl lit up my darkest nights, like a shooting star,
My last thought before I slept, my first come the morn,
I was besotted by a girl who didn’t know I’d been born.

I wondered how and when I could chance to meet her,
I practiced the perfect words with which I would greet her,
I alone could see she her realise our stars were destined to align;
So sad, the dreams of a short-pantsed pimply Frankenstein.

I made my approach, in the lonely corridor there was only her and I,
I tried my long practiced patter, but my throat was bone dry…
To see the one you want to want you with all your being
Waltz past you, eyes all a’sparkle, oblivious, unseeing…

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Welcome to my nightmare. A touch of inspiration from reading the blog of a supply teacher undergoing a tortuous re-education. Someone who is also a fan of Kings ‘The Stand.’ So I thought I’d weave the strands together for a bit of fun.

Driven To Distraction.

I wake up in the morning, dark, rise with the friggin’ lark,
I clutch the coffee cup, wait for the night terrors to pass,
Fire up the Fiesta, sigh, hand reluctant to shift out of Park
Into Drive to drive on autopilot to an unteachable first class.

On arrival I take a deep breath, a Diazepam, then two more
Before bravely walking into my recurring real-life horror story,
Fighting the sea of indifference shuffling down the corridor;
Cell-centred blank eyed zombies, brainless but ambulatory.

At lunch I’ve no taste for my sandwich, I take two Tums instead,
My faith in talking sense sense to foolish minds continues to unravel
Despite spending my lunch communing with the arch Deputy Head,
I told her of her schools flaws, she told me to fu– about sex and travel.

So, advice taken, I’m off to the Fiesta and off I fu– off home I go;
A little listening to a audiobook might restore my equanimity,
As the strains of Stephen Kings ‘The Stand’ ooze from the stereo
I think I might share his dim view on some things like, oh, inhumanity?