Author Archives: obbverse

About obbverse

I'd like to think I'm a wary optimist in a glass half-empty kind of a world. I try to to find humour in the world. Humour, even black humour can light the darkest situation, if that’s not a contradiction! I love the twists and turns, the layers and half-steps that is the English language. Books, imagination are important to me. Ever since I was a kid I found if you have imagination you're never alone, lonely or sad. Just turn the page. I enjoy travel, under the usual financial constraints, and being a parent helps in not letting me become a moody introspective naval gazer. I hope. let me meditate on that... At the end of the day if you can't laugh at life's idiocy, you can at least smile. Wryly. In a crazy Trumpean world, if you can't smile, there's only despair, and let's not go there. Smile.

Getting wet and wild on your holiday/honeymoon. A bit of a cautionary tale.

Taken, With A Dose Of Salt.

The summer sun was dazzling bright,
The sea a’sparkling in the sunlight,
Not one solitary cooling cloud in sight
For honeymooners on the Great Australian Bight.

Up on deck after a hot ardourous night
Still this couple are feeling set to ignite,
Where, where to escape 100-degrees Fahrenheit?
The sea offers a cool promise of respite.

Skinny dipping is a sheer naked delight,
The seas ebb and flow sure to primordially excite,
But bare bodies are also sure to whet the appetite
Of Tiger, Tigers, Basking, a bloody Great White.

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Had your fill of FAKE News? Well, remember, you heard it here First.

Stand up Comic.

Funnily I never thought the President was a funny ha ha bloke
But now the laugh’s on me, heh heh, and, seriously, l get the joke,
Hee hee, he’s hysterical, he changes history with one Master stroke-
He gathers the gullible, has a giggle to himself, then simply says ‘I misspoke.’

The President returns home after meeting his Russian counterpart for a private wee tete-a-tete. A private and it would seem, illuminating and revelatory meeting. Try to picture it, as Donald did.

All That Glistens…

The President looked down from the casement
Of his glittering golden GREAT gilded Trump Tower,
The full moons soft saffron suffused glow meant
Don’s Rolex showed he was nearing the witching hour.

Tonight the moon seems full, of dark portent,
Tonight Don is as quiet and shy as a wall-flower,
Tonight its rich unadulterated light has lent
A blood-moon cast to his petulant glower.

Oh, how it pains this peach-of-a-President
To find Captain ‘Merica’s lost his superpower
As well as losing that sweet smell of victory scent,
Since he parleyed with Putin that’s started to sour.

In the FAKE photos Don sees it, and it is all too evident;
‘Neath a fake tan lies a sad whey-faced sack of sh– flour,
How he regrets Moscow and the time there ill-spent,
In the moons glow the tears flow, a regular golden shower.

Donny and Vladimir, sitting in Helsinki, this spells the end of D e m o c r a c y. Or, put another way, the first rule about Liars Club is there is no Liars Club. (But there is.)

Vlad To The Bone. (Apologies to George Thorogood.)

When two princes amongst men met up in Helsinki
Both promised, vowed, swore a swear with extended pinky
To put aside that old veil of dark secrecy, so deep, black and inky;
If Vlad’s pants look uncomfortably hot, don’t Dons seem a whiff stinky?

In a most comradely fashion the two privately conversed,
When they emerged into the light, all dark clouds dispersed,
Donald smiling dimly,Vladimir’s smile smug, satisfied, fit to burst,
How did Vlad contrive to convince Don to put ‘Meric- err… Russia First?

Donald Trump continues his goodwill tour around Europe, showering all and sundry, peasant and gentry, with his ‘charm.’

The King Of The World.

When Donald went off to Windsor to visit the queen
He thought it a suitable platform to strut and preen,
Sadly, Don doesn’t know much… about Royal protocol;
He strode out ahead of Her Majesty on the Royal stroll,
Did he thoughtlessly think he was strolling on his links so green?
He Royally ballsed-up, but for Liz its not the first horses ass she’s seen.

World cup, England heading home empty handed, but hey, tomorrow’s a bright new day! Isn’t it? Positively.

No Direction Home.

The England party struck boldly forth
To a knees-up in Putin’s welcoming North,
Supporters hopes, then expectations increased
As they watch another unexpected sun rise in the East.

After England’s semi-disappointment they’re heading South
Going from up for the cup to looking down in the mouth,
Even as the sun sinks and Englands high hopes go West
Fourth place seems strangely better than second best.

Welcome to my nightmare. A touch of inspiration from reading the blog of a supply teacher undergoing a tortuous re-education. Someone who is also a fan of Kings ‘The Stand.’ So I thought I’d weave the strands together for a bit of fun.

Driven To Distraction.

I wake up in the morning, dark, rise with the friggin’ lark,
I clutch the coffee cup, wait for the night terrors to pass,
Fire up the Fiesta, sigh, hand reluctant to shift out of Park
Into Drive to drive on autopilot to an unteachable first class.

On arrival I take a deep breath, a Diazepam, then two more
Before bravely walking into my recurring real-life horror story,
Fighting the sea of indifference shuffling down the corridor;
Cell-centred blank eyed zombies, brainless but ambulatory.

At lunch I’ve no taste for my sandwich, I take two Tums instead,
My faith in talking sense sense to foolish minds continues to unravel
Despite spending my lunch communing with the arch Deputy Head,
I told her of her schools flaws, she told me to fu– about sex and travel.

So, advice taken, I’m off to the Fiesta and off I fu– off home I go;
A little listening to a audiobook might restore my equanimity,
As the strains of Stephen Kings ‘The Stand’ ooze from the stereo
I think I might share his dim view on some things like, oh, inhumanity?